‘On the Side’ Part 2: Twin Weddings

So here is one very novel concept that my sister Monu and I were confronted with: Twin Weddings. Most of the time, Monu and I unfortunately being of the cursed, fairer sex and being of ages 24 and 25 years respectively, are pestered incessantly by our respective folks and then some more by the other's folks about tying the knot. We are both like those perfectly ripe fruits that must now be sold off in the marriage market for we are just the right age. In fact I, my parents would argue, am quite on the verge of being discarded in the "too old" category. See parents will never think of you as X years but as Going on X+1 years, and somehow 25 is still OK but OH MY GOD 26 is a big NO NO!

Anyways, so one nice wintery yet sunny morning, Monu and I came to the dining area for breakfast, looking forward to the post-breakfast lazing in the sun all day with a nice cup of tea or two and engaging in idle chatting. Down in the kitchen, we were surprised to find Monu's mother in unusually high-spirit and we were wondering why that is, since the only time she can ever be so happy is when all members of the family have woken up before 7 and have finished with breakfast before 9. I glanced at the watch: 10:30 a.m. and Monu and I being the first people to arrive for breakfast, were naturally perplexed as to what could possibly make our home-maker so very happy.

Turns out, Monu's mom had found a single arrow to hit the two people on her wedding hit-list, who at that moment were standing before her with very puzzled expressions on their faces and empty plates in their hands. I am, of course talking of the twin-wedding concept that apparently in the present days of recession and economic hardships no longer applies to biological twins.

Suneeta aunty, the lady who has been coming to our house to help with the household chores, had married off her two daughters in one such ceremony and the idea had firmly planted its menacing tentacles in my dear aunt's head. So as she tossed paranthas in our place, she also tossed these images from the the imaginary joint-wedding of Monu and I, which would have killed the appetite of lesser girls but not us.

Here is how twin weddings work: Two pandals side by side, same guests, double-shagan though (else this would be a recipe for disaster, same food and so forth. Here is what I don't understand though. If one couple is getting married, what does the other do? Attend it like another family member or sit around and wait for its turn? Also, do the baraat's come in at the same time or one after the other? Again, how is the time managed so that neither party is left unattended or waiting. Third, and this is very important- what is the dance arrangement like? I mean we have this one baraat group and this other baraat group. Do they all dance together (this may lead to unnecessary competitiveness as Punjabis are prone to displaying at most inopportune moments) or do they dance separately, which will raise challenges for the brides' side who would not know which party to dance with.

I shared these concerns with my aunt, whose excitement thankfully diluted to some extent. See, Sunita aunty and her lovely daughters are not Punjabi, ergo the world and all its customs are anyways at least ten times easier for them. But innovation such as these in a Punjabi wedding-setting would be disastrous. Enough said. To sunning-self and gossiping then, I say to Monu who has already picked the tea-mugs.